Embrace Change: Why New Year's Resolutions Are Overrated

New Year's resolutions are trash. By now, many of you have already found it difficult to fulfill the goals you set. You are not going to the gym daily and have stopped your juice cleanse.  Why does this happen? You don’t have to wait until January 1st to change. 

Tony Robbins said it best, “All changes are created in a moment – it's just that most of us wait until certain things happen before we finally decide to make a shift.”  People change every day, at any moment. Change occurs instantly. Once you have decided, in your mind, that you desire change, everything else begins to fall into place. Changing your mind changes your life.  Most people can tell you the moment they decided to change. When we make the internal shift that our lives must be different, nothing can stop us. Suddenly, we find a way. Resources appear. Opportunities show up. Everything shifts when we shift.  I have heard story after story of people who made drastic changes: 

“My granddaughter was running outside, and I realized I could not keep up with her. I was so nervous about how far she would run. I panicked. It was the first time I realized how unsafe my weight gain made me and others.  That was the moment I decided to lose weight. None of the previous things I had tried worked because I was not serious. Being a good grandmother was more important to me than anything. I couldn’t do that at 350 pounds.”

“I was standing in the kitchen making breakfast, and he was yelling at me. He called me a ‘dumb bitch’ and went on and on about how I can’t do anything right. He had called me names before but something about that name felt different. I couldn’t believe I let it get that far. At that very moment, I knew that the name-calling had to stop, or I was leaving. I’d dealt with this for years, but I knew, right then and there,  I wasn’t going to put up with that anymore.”

“I was sitting at my desk, and I got an email, and my boss took credit for my work…again. I quit that day. I didn’t even have another job lined up. I just knew I couldn’t respect myself and keep working in that environment.” 

“This lady tasted a cake I brought to a party and asked me to make a cake for her wedding. She told me to name my price. This was about the hundredth time I’d got an offer like this. I decided, at that moment, to start my own business. I already had paying clients…I just needed to get over the fear of change.”

All change occurs when you are spiritually moved to change. Every attempt toward change is an effort in the right direction, but when the spiritual shift occurs, everything happens. Imagine Tina Turner in “What’s Love Got to Do With It,” Tina probably “left” Ike several times, but she will never forget when she knew she was done. It didn’t matter that she didn’t have a plan, money, or a place to go…she just knew she wasn’t going back there. She ran across highways to get away! Nothing mattered but her freedom. That change didn’t occur on January 1st. 

I will never forget the moment I decided to change my life. I was sitting in the doctor's office at Emory University. I hadn’t slept in 3 days because I had terrible anxiety and insomnia. My doctor told me she was willing to prescribe Ambien to help me get some rest. She said, “I would encourage you to use this as a last resort because Ambien can be addictive.” The word addictive stung my ears. My father was an addict, and I promised myself I would never let any drug have power over my life. I walked out of that office with one resolution: I don’t care what I have to do; I have to find rest in my mind and body, and I need to do it without prescription drugs. At that moment, everything changed. I suddenly had money to attend wellness retreats (something I previously would have hesitated to splurge on), I had time to read books, I changed relationships that didn’t serve me, I didn’t care what other people thought…I just needed to change. I had one goal: to experience rest in my body and peace in my mind. Here is what I know for sure: 

When you are so tired of your shit, you will change. When you have suffered enough, you will change. When your spirit is no longer at peace with your current lifestyle, you will change. When you are done with not reaching your full potential, you will change. Change happens when you commit to a new experience. It doesn’t start on January 1. If you want, your change can start today. 

If you need me, I’m here. I love you lots. Be sure to love yourself.